Real Madrid vs. Santos Laguna Kaká. Xabi Alonso. Sergio Ramos. And yes, Cristiano Ronaldo. Real Madrid’s big guns take on Las Vegas High product Herculez Gomez and his Mexican squad at Sam Boyd Stadium. Don’t call it soccer. This is fútbol. August 5, 8 p.m., $65-$250.
Laugh Dance Local writers/actresses Maggie Lillis and Erin Singer team up for a night of original sketches bolstered by stand-up comedy and improvised hilarity from The Sleeping Policemen. If you want to laugh till your belly hurts, this is the place. August 3, 10 p.m., $10, Onyx Theatre.
Nicki Minaj The rapper/singer opened for Britney Spears last year, but the way Minaj’s tracks consistently climb the charts, it’s hardly surprising she’s headlining this time around. August 4, 8 p.m., $48-$76, Planet Hollywood.
H.R. Those initials stand for “Human Rights,” but you know him better as the singer for seminal reggae-inflected D.C. hardcore outfit Bad Brains. If you don’t, get to a copy of 1982 LP Bad Brains, pronto. With Rule of Thumb, Sector 7G, Unfair Fight, August 4, 8 p.m., $12-$15, Cheyenne Saloon.
Weird Al Yankovic When SNL digital-short king Andy Samberg was still in diapers, Weird Al was blazing parody music video trails. See his hits (and his luscious hair) live at the Cannery. August 4, 8 p.m., $20-$75.
Beck Mr. Hansen doesn’t have a new album to promote, which means this set should be loaded with classic material. Also, he’s got his Mutations Tour band in tow. (As if you needed extra incentives.) August 8, 8 p.m., $49-$69, the Pearl.
Summer Lobster Bake Station Casinos eateries the Broiler, Sonoma Cellar, Austin’s, Fuego, Charcoal Room and MRKT are offering a whole lobster with smoked sausage, potatoes and corn for $21.99. Through August 31, stationcasinos.com.
Peanut Butter Multi Grain Cheerios Step 1: Pour cereal into bowl. Step 2: Top with Greek yogurt and fresh cut berries. Step 3: Eat PB&J in a bowl for breakfast.