Blue Man Group, recent Friday night, late show. We were sitting front row center. To my left was one of those “brassy” women who think that talking too loudly, with alarming candor, makes her “free-spirited.” She was drunk, of course, which didn’t help, and I was sober, and maybe that didn’t help, either.

“WE GOT HIM A HOOKER TONIGHT,” she said, indicating the man she’d come in with. I must’ve looked taken aback, but only because I was.

“He thinks I’m kidding,” she said to her guy. She turned back to me. “I’m not,” she insisted. “We did. She was a brunette. SHAVED. We called and said, ‘Send us the kinkiest girl you got. He can have at her, I’ll be in the casino. Bet you’d like a night like that, wouldn’t ya?!” I must’ve looked alarmed, but only because I was. She glanced at my wife, then playfully elbowed me. “YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO SAY NO! HA-HA-HA!”

Blue Man Group was terrific, though.