I’d never ask a girl on a strip-club date. But when S. asked me, I said yes. We weren’t the only couple at the Spearmint Rhino that night. Apparently, strip clubs are semi-popular Vegas date destinations. But why is that? Don’t strip clubs intimidate women? Make them self-conscious about their bodies?

“I actually felt less pressure than usual,” S. told me after our date. “At a nightclub, I feel like I have to compete with the other girls for men’s attention. But when we went to the Rhino, it was a given that the guys would be gawking at the strippers. So I didn’t feel bad that I didn’t get many looks.”

I had another theory as to why S. didn’t feel self-conscious: She’s very attractive herself. So I asked her, “If you thought the dancers were more attractive than you, would you have had such a good time?”

“If that were the case,” S. replied, “I probably wouldn’t have gone.”

Guys: Unless you’re with a girl who’s got superhuman self-confidence, steer clear of strip club invitations.

Also steer clear if you want a future with your girl: “If I met a guy, and he proposed taking me to a strip club,” S. told me, “it’d be obvious that our relationship was going in the sexual direction and that we wouldn’t have longevity. If you start off with something so sexual and intense, where do you go from there?”

The main upside of taking a girl to a strip club is that it might turn her on. But the odds are slim—S. says she’s wasn’t—and the potential for disaster is high.

So wait until she asks you.