You can’t have a proper Super Bowl party without the proper snacks, but this is no time to get fancy. We scoured that Internet thingy for fun, easy recipes. Here’s everything you’ll need to keep it simple, stupid.

Guacamole Don’t subject your friends to pasty, store-bought guac when you can fake the freshness so easily. Get a load of avocados the day before; if they’re hard and unripe, put them in a paper bag overnight. Cut them in half, toss the pits and scoop the creamy goodness into a bowl. Add a tub of fresh salsa from the grocery store and mix. Cheat better: You like jar salsa? Weirdo. The Internet prefers chunky Tostitos or Pace brands.

Nachos Be smart; eat well: Use thick tortilla chips, grate your own cheese (it makes a big difference) and use the oven. If you need further directions on this one, there’s no hope, so we’ll just say this: Meat is a luxury; real nachos need only be topped with salsa, guac, canned jalapeño slices and sour cream. Wanna get crazy? Sub out plain chips for as many different flavors of Doritos as you can find. Cheat better: You’re lazy. Trader Joe’s seasoned beef, bean and cheese dip is pretty solid.

Jalapeño Poppers You gonna mess with batter and hot oil all day? Hell no. Ask your wife to cut the ’peños in half lengthwise and remove the core and seeds. Pack those suckers with cream cheese, wrap each in half a slice of bacon, and put them on a wire rack over a cookie sheet in a 375-degree oven for 20 minutes. Boom! Pop those, suckers. Cheat better: This is the best cheating.

Wings Put raw wings in a large roasting pan, drizzle with olive oil and season with salt and pepper. Roast at 375 degrees for 25 minutes, then flip the wings and give ’em 20 more minutes. When it’s time to munch, toss with equal parts melted butter and Frank’s Red Hot, then pop ’em back in the oven for a final crisping. Cheat better: Seriously, frozen wings? Apparently, Tyson Any’tizers Hot & Spicy don’t suck. You should be ashamed.

Pigs in a Blanket Forget the blanket and try pig with more pig. Start with small smoked sausages, bacon, brown sugar, maple syrup and cayenne pepper. Set the oven to 400 degrees, cut the bacon slices in half and fry them in a pan, so they’re cooked but not crispy. Cool them on paper towels, then wrap each sausage with bacon. Roll the bundles in brown sugar, poke through with a toothpick, and set them up on that wire-rack-on-cookie-sheet thing. Drizzle with syrup and sprinkle with cayenne, then bake for 25 minutes. But don’t eat them all, jerk. Share! Cheat better: Make an extra batch and keep it to yourself.