There’s no bench, a la The People’s Court. It’s all podiums on a stage where Wolf Blitzer would be right at home and the defendants look like game show contestants. This is an arena where the order of the day is whether someone should pay damages for supplying a cake that was supposed to look like a river—but ended up looking like a pond. Where poop is examined to determine if it came from a dog—or a puppy. It’s like Dr. Phil meets Judge Judy.
It’s the world of Swift Justice, a crazy mess of law and psychobabble, and starting next season, it all belongs to Jackie Glass, the Clark County District Court judge whose 15 minutes of fame came while overseeing the O.J. Simpson robbery trial in 2008.
Glass has considerable robes to fill. Her predecessor, Nancy Grace, has been a controversy Swiffer on a host of networks, including CNN, HLN and Court TV. The syndicated Justice was her latest endeavor, but with the show moving to California, Grace is out—and Glass is in.
The good news is, Glass appears more than up to the task of supplying the bon mots necessary to make this kind of easily digestible television work. To wit: “I told Mr. Simpson I didn’t know if he was arrogant or ignorant or both. During the trial and through this proceeding I got the answer ... and it was both.” Or: “I’m surprised you haven’t seen my head spin and fire come out of my mouth at this point in this trial.”
To Glass, we say: You’ll fit right in. Just watch out for the dog poop. Or is it puppy?