In a free-advertising coup, Netflix has released a study revealing that 46 percent of couples have “cheated” on one another by surreptitiously watching that next episode alone. Guilty as charged.
According to Netflix—which got its stats from a survey and not, thank God, by creeping on your smart TV—66 percent of cheaters can’t stop watching because “the shows are so good.” I like Stranger Things as much as the next overly nostalgic millennial, but my boyfriend would never buy that alibi. When he wakes up in the middle of the night to find me still watching and in desperate need of a “When the Fun Stops” brochure, we know the problem is more insidious than great television.
I blame my so-called “cheating” on that thief of tomorrow’s productivity, the autoplay function that begins a new series episode quicker than you can stop it. It’s an abominable form of corporate hypnotism. What’s your excuse?
