Dining

Squeeze some bacon on it! Wait, what?

Image
Pass the pig in a bottle, please.

We’re in the age of Cheez Whiz. The McRib sandwich. Meat you can spread on a cracker. So what is so truly funny about the notion of bacon from a bottle? The folks at thinkgeek.com thought to include this fictional product on their site as an April Fools’ joke, but I, for one, couldn’t help but think that it was just the next natural progression in the American diet.

More

Beyond the Weekly
Squeez Bacon

And why not? After all, we’ve proven as a country that we have no compunction about stuffing lab-produced crap down our pieholes! So let’s go whole hog, pun completely intended.

The “advertisement” for Squeez Bacon does nothing to quiet that voice in my head. The degree of detail is stunning: A shelf life of 12 years, no refrigeration necessary, made from “U.S.-bred swine,” even a minute-long video showing the possible uses. Stick it on a shelf, slap a ridiculously expensive price on it, and I’m there.

Share
Photo of Ken Miller

Ken Miller is Las Vegas Magazine's managing editor, having previously served as associate editor at Las Vegas Weekly, assistant features ...

Get more Ken Miller

Previous Discussion:

  • La Monja will be a Mexican-style raw bar, while Hatsumi will offer a more elegant experience, focused on traditional robata and irori grilling.

  • Head to the bar for executive chef Mark Andelbradt’s counter-only menu and prepare for a range of explosive flavors.

  • You come from the music, but you leave talking just as much about the food.

  • Get More Dining Stories
Top of Story