I came face to face with my estranged son. I yelled at him to stay away from me. Then a friend and I loaded up a car and tried to drive down a very steep hill. There was a raging river very close to the road. The road became icy and then I woke up. I was surprised to have dreamt about my son. I haven’t seen him in years. – Judy 67, Grand Marais, Manatoba

Lauri: Your dream suggests that the situation with your son still bothers you. This is why you tell him to stay away from you ... it’s not so much him you want to stay away but the pain that is represented by him. The friend is the part of you that can be a friend to yourself, that can and ought to be kind to yourself. The things you load the car with symbolize the things that are in your life that fulfill you that you should continue to take with you down your road of life. The raging river is your rage. It is very close to the road because you may find yourself being close to tumultuous emotions when you give enough thought to the situation. The ice is connected to the ice you feel from your son. Your relationship is frozen and sometimes that reality stops you in your own tracks. Did something happen yesterday that would have triggered this? Were you thinking about him? Did someone bring him up? It seems your dream is trying to help you cope with what still hurts.

Judy replies: Yes, there was a discussion yesterday about how many children in the 35-42 age group treat their parents unfairly! We were sharing “ugly” stories, but we all agree it must have been something we as parents did to make these kids behave the way they do. Anyways, I AM trying to be kind to myself. You are so right and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me this insight.