At a preliminary hearing last week in Los Angeles, actor Michael Douglas testified for the prosecution against Dawnette Knight, who apparently harbored a basic instinct for the Oscar winner. As reported by Reuters, prosecutors claim the 32-year-old Knight, whom Douglas recognized from a Las Vegas golf tournament, stalked and threatened to kill his wife, actress Catherine Zeta-Jones, so she could be with him. On the stand, Douglas described the woman at the Vegas tourney as "hyperventilating a little bit, and her behavior was a bit strange." In Vegas? How could he tell?
Later, Knight's attorney, Richard Herman, asked Douglas if he was aware that female stalkers were seldom violent and usually not dangerous. At which point, prosecutor Debra Archulta quipped: "Isn't that the premise of a movie called Fatal Attraction?"
So CSI holdouts—or is misunderstood actors?—Jorja Fox and George Eads have rejoined the fold at the Vegas-centric smash? Big deal. Word leaking out of the ersatz-Vegas set in Santa Clarita, California, is that a potential strike is brewing among the show's cast of supporting maggots. Now THAT would shut down production in a heartbeat (or lack of same). And if the maggots do stage a walkout, the show's corpses say they'll refuse to cross the picket lines.
Urban Barbershop Word of the Week: 'Thudda Thudda'
Etymology: Unknown.
Definition: A beautiful woman, a foxy mama.
Usage: "I went to Ra on Thursday? Nothing but thudda thuddas."
New York-based Edison Schools, the nation's largest private operator of public schools, swept into the Clark County School District four years ago on a tattered wing and a shareholder-financed prayer, its backers promising miraculous reform for seven of our most struggling campuses despite a spotty record of achievement elsewhere in the nation. At the time, Marzette Lewis, whose high-decibel activism and tiresome histrionics are legendary (and not in a good way), carped about allowing Edison in, claiming it'd be the educational death of minority children. In protest of the $38 million contract, she lead a funeral procession at a school board meeting.
Turns out Lewis was somewhat prescient. As the Review-Journal reports, Edison has had a marginal impact on the seven schools—only two have stayed off the low-performing-schools list and a handful have been smitten with high teacher turnover (they work longer days and often on weekends). Edison officials in New York failed to return a call for comment.
Was this prompted by Linda Ronstadt?
No, it was actually formed several weeks before that incident. A group of entertainers in the Maryland area started it.
How's the response been locally?
It's been pretty good so far, but I just started last week. I would guess at this point we probably have a dozen so far out of Vegas. [
He can't think of their names.]
Do you think entertainers tend to be more liberal?
Part of what we were trying to demonstrate with this organization is to prove that the vast majority of entertainers are mainstream Americans who entertain American families and families from all over the world, and we have basic traditional values. And I guess in the sense that Linda Ronstadt and Michael Moore and blowhards like that have been misrepresenting entertainers as us all being radicals from Hollywood, and we're really not
Can you tell a pro-Bush joke?
[
Laughs heartily.] I haven't written any. I mostly do corporate humor.
(Then he supplies us with the following: Things Michael Moore Likes to Do on His Day Off. 1.) Record himself ambushing the paperboy with media-conspiracy questions; 2.) Invite Al Franken to a sleepover and play "spin-the-truth"; 3.) Pretend he's God in prank calls to Charlton Heston; 4.) Report back to Barbara Streisand for further instructions; 5.) Apply to fill the recently vacated Slim-Fast spokesperson role.)
Learn more at www.entertainersforbush.com.
Mercury columnist Andrew Kiraly: "Bring back monarchy!" (July 29)
R-J columnist Steve Sebelius: "Suddenly, that whole monarchy thing is starting to look pretty good." (August 1)