THE DREAM ZONE |
with Lauri Quinn Loewenberg Dear Dream Zone, I've had the same dream of a mother and daughter living in an apartment alone. Their neighbor makes a hole through the wall behind their fridge to get into their apartment while they are out. At night he pushes the fridge out and climbs through the hole and watches them sleep. One night it progressed to where I was seeing through his eyes while his hands went toward the mother's throat. At that point I woke up. I've no clue what the dreams mean. Premonitions run in my family. Maybe it's a premonition?
The man is some negative energy or fear that may be trying to force itself into your life. The woman and daughter are both aspects of you. Is there an issue regarding your own mother, or perhaps even yourself as a mother (if you are one or wanting to become one)? What is causing your relationship with your mother or your own nurturing, mother-self to feel threatened?
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I am involved with someone I wouldn't call a boyfriend just yet, though at times it is obvious. We get along so well and just feel comfortable. I'm not sure if this is a long-term relationship. I'm putting this in your hands to see if you can make sense of this dilemma. We've known each other for about a year, but how can you be sure? Should I continue this relationship or is this a short-term tryst that will spawn nothing more than a good friendship?
Dear In Bloom,
I see this relationship has long-term potential. He worries to the point of distraction, and that's the biggest challenge I see in this relationship. As long as you both practice keeping worry at bay, I see this can be a "rest-of-your-life" situation. Your "boyfriend" has to view you as a source of comfort and harmony before there's true commitment on his part. He feels attacked by the world a lot—some of it's true and some is because he is a perpetual worrier.
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I left Las Vegas in September 2003 to move back South to marry someone I had known for three years as a close friend (but I was NEVER in love with him). He is stable, intelligent and has a prestigious, financially rewarding job. He's a sensible choice, but I don't feel passion for him. We haven't been "close" in six months. I'm ashamed I let a man's financial status affect my judgment. I thought I had more integrity than that.
I was living with a man in Las Vegas who was so passionate and fun—but he makes only one-sixth of what Southern man makes, and he had problems with anger and substance abuse. But he addressed them in therapy. He raised his voice in anger at me, but that was as far as things ever went; 98.7 percent of the time he treated me lovingly. I left because I was ashamed to live in Las Vegas with a dealer. It sounded like a bad B movie. We purchased a home in Vegas that I miss terribly. I am self-sufficient and can find work anywhere. Should I stay with rich, stable, passion-free white-collar man, or return to my uninhibited, red-hot, blue-collar man? I am paralyzed and can't decide.
Dear Broken,
There are three levels of love: lustful, romantic and compassionate.
The man you're with now intuitively knows what's going on. He's always known he wasn't your first choice and loved you anyway. He's always known he doesn't ignite your passion and loved you anyway. Your husband represents that highest form of love, compassionate love. If you looked more closely at your husband, you'll see a man spiritually connected with his destiny.
Deep down, you wish to live up to your husband's integrity, but you think you only deserve Mr. Las Vegas, who loves the sweaty role of being a man, not the more refined one. He's into strip bars, sexual intrigue, gambling, flirts when not around you and lives for the moment. I feel on edge for you like I did when that British man wagered his fortune on red at the Plaza. Don't do it. You may win (for now), but there is no long-term relationship here.
This is not about money, but you thinking you don't deserve a meaningful life with someone who loves you. This developed more out of boredom than out of really wanting Mr. Las Vegas.
If you decide to leave your husband, make sure you're aware of what you're giving up. You have created the perfect environment to do something meaningful with your life and even step into your destiny. I think you've underestimated your husband.
Mona Van Joseph is a licensed professional in the psychic arts. E-mail questions to [email protected].