"So, is that a wedding ring on your finger?," asked the tall, sexy, blond stranger. We were standing at the crowded Circle Bar at the Hard Rock Hotel and he was pressed up against me as we lobbied for the bartender's attention.
"What? This old thing?" I said, referring to the shiny new promise ring my boyfriend, Jay, had just given me. "No, I'm not married, I'm single, single, single!" I chuckled a little too hard to be believable. "In fact, you could call this a 'prom-iscuity ring'," I said with a flirtatious wink. My lie was followed by another loud, obnoxious chuckle.
"Well, in that case," he said as he leaned down and nuzzled my neck, "how do you do?"
"How do I do what?" I asked, like the saucy wench that I am. Guilt was never even a factor as I lied to him about my true relationship status.
He whispered in my ear the things that he'd like me to do the most. I was blushing so hard the heat was radiating from my skin and racing down my body in a throbbing and pulsating burst just south of the border. As he wrapped his arms around my waist he said, "You're such a tiny little thing, and you have the most beautiful skin, eyes, lips, nose and ears I've ever seen. Hell, you're almost perfect." His nuzzles turned to tiny kisses at the nape of my neck. I let my head drop to the side and I heard myself beg him not to stop. People were starting to stare, but I didn't care, I was swept up in the moment.
He placed his full lips against mine and kissed me so tenderly that a soft moan escaped. His hands started to wander down my back to my bottom. "Ooooooh," he whispered into my ear, causing chills to run down my spine, "you have the firmest little heinie I've ever felt!"
OK, that was a little over the top. I finally realized—I'm only dreaming this. "Quick, grab his joint before you wake up!" I heard my subconscience yell at me.
Too late. I opened one sleepy eye and found myself in the middle of my bed ... alone. No tall, sexy, blond stranger, no Jay, no action. I think it was my continued anxiety about being "promised" to someone combined with the lack of carnal interludes lately that were to blame for my dirty, sneaky dream.
I was, naturally, racked with guilt. Just then my phone rang. Crud, is there no rest for the weary, confused and relationship-challenged? I knew it would be Jay asking me to come out for the weekend, and I wasn't sure I wanted to make the trip. I wasn't ready to go another 15 rounds about what the future was going to hold for us. Would I move there, would he move here, would I consider having more children, could he live his life without children of his own? Blah, blah, blah.
"Hello?" I said in a sleepy tone, trying desperately not to sound like a woman who was just cheating in her dreams.
"Hi," said a vaguely familiar man's voice.
"Yes?," I asked, hoping to get him to talk more so I could recognize his voice.
"Hi, baby," he said. I froze. Even though I was wearing long johns under my blanket and down comforter, I went cold.
"Todd?" I asked hesitantly.
"Of course. Whom were you expecting?"
He was fishing.
"Nothing, I mean, I wasn't thinking that I would ... it's been months, so I just ... you know," I stuttered. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I sounded like a blundering idiot, and I hated that he could still do that to me. I should just hang up, I thought, unplug the phone and then call the phone company from my cell and have them change my number.
Todd and I had dated for almost a year before Jay and I transitioned into "loving couple" status. I used to cry on Jay's shoulders about how much I cared for Todd and how no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't get him to commit. He broke my heart at least a half a dozen times, and every time I'd promise myself that enough was enough. I knew I had to cut the strings and move on with my life, but then he'd call with promises that he could change and that he wanted to be part of my life and that he was falling in love with me. Promises were made to be broken. But, being the sucker that I am, I'd believe him, and eventually I'd take him back. Then we'd start making progress, he'd get spooked and walk out on me again, leaving me feeling heartbroken and desperately lonely.
Jay was always there to pick up the pieces and listen. He never gave any advice except to say that Todd had no idea how lucky he was to have me, and that he should be able to see that.
My, how the tide has turned. Now I'm confused about my relationship with Jay and Todd is calling. But for what reason, I didn't know.
"I'd like to see you, Sonja. I have some things I need to say to you, things I should have said a long time ago." What the ...? Oh, no. There is nothing he can say that is worth hearing.
"OK," I said.
I'm such a jerk. My eyes fell to the promise ring that I'd just referred to as a prom-iscuity ring in my cheating dream. Suddenly I wondered: Are promises made to be broken?
Sonja is a writer who covers the ins and outs of relationships. Or is it the ups and downs?