THE DREAM ZONE |
with Lauri Quinn Loewenberg A lot of bugs were crawling all over the place. I kept killing them but they never went away!
|
I've been single for a while and most of my friends are married. A very close friend suggested online dating. It sucks. I met a few nice guys but all in all, I'm not very happy with the whole scene. Then I got a message from this guy in New York and we were instantly attracted to each other. We exchanged photos, and began talking nonstop via e-mail as much as seven times a day. Then we started to talk on the phone four or five times every day. About a month after we began talking, he told me he loved me. WOW! We continued to talk and the attraction between us was amazing.
Then he hopped onto a plane and we had the most amazing week. However, during his visit I received a call from a lady who claimed to be his wife. He swore she was a psycho ex-girlfriend who seemed to drop into his life every few months to stir things up. I have no reason to not believe him. He told me to make room in my closet—he was packing and moving. He would be here in a month.
It's been about five weeks since the visit and the "ex" has reared her ugly head a few times. She has a key to his car, steals his phone and retrieves all of his messages. She calls me and I just hang up.
He still says he's not married and for me to be patient, as he is planning on moving here. He tells me he loves me and is in love with me and that we made a commitment and he's sticking to it. I want so much to be positive and for this to be my Prince Charming, but with the BS involving this loony-toon ex, it's sometimes difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Any thoughts? (Keeping my fingers crossed that he is my Prince Charming!)
Dear PC Hopeful,
Why do you have to make room in your closet for him? Why isn't he arranging for his own digs, or reserving one of our fine new Las Vegas condos for this move? It's because he's a little short on funds, isn't it?:
"I'm really sorry, pookie-bear, but my 'ex' just cleaned me out. I know you and I can build our life together because this is true love, and that's you, baby. I've never felt this way about anyone. I've waited my whole life for you."
Sound familiar?
You're one of three women with whom he's playing this game. You've seen not only the witty and attractive side, but also his backpedaling, "I-can't-be-entirely-honest-with-you" side. He's a "love stalker"—he preys on women looking for Prince Charming. He thrives on this. I wish he'd put his smarts to better use, but my cards tell me that this gigolo is a con artist. The reason there's been a bit of cooling off is he's now flirting with a third woman, as well as stringing along you and the ex.
The next time his "ex" calls you, talk to her and find out what he's been telling her. You've bought his story without question and you're afraid to question him (or her) because you think if you behave like he's told you his "ex" does that he won't be in love with you anymore, either. His ex is not a "psycho," she's trying to get the whole story any way she can. She's so hooked into him that it's going to take the help of a good therapist for her to get over him.
You'll begin to see his crueler side as soon as you back off (if you haven't already). Please don't let him move in and please don't think that this one is your soul mate. It's not supposed to hurt when there's real love. He's desperate because he's a fake. Uncross your fingers, maintain your dignity, and simply decide to let this one go.
Mona Van Joseph is a licensed professional in the psychic arts through the city of Las Vegas. You may e-mail questions to [email protected].