Computer scientists recently applied "emotion recognition" software to Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, determining that her smile indicates she was 83 percent happy, 9 percent disgusted, 6 percent fearful and 2 percent angry. The news prompted these comments on a bulletin board at Geek.com:
• "I am 17 percent intrigued, 12 percent flummoxed and 71 percent in denial about this news article."
• "They need to determine if Mona is a woman, a man or a combination of both."
• "I know what she is thinking ... 'Da Vinci said this was only going to take an hour. Just keep smiling and if he's not done in the next 30 minutes, I'm outta here."
• "Mona Lisa was getting some from Da Vinci. Can't you tell by the look on her face?"
• "Hmm, I just thought she had gas."
Leave it to geeks to take something beautiful and make it ugly.
Academy, Schmacademy |
The Las Vegas Film Critics Society (of which Weekly critic Josh Bell is a member) announced its annual Sierra Awards this week, honoring Brokeback Mountain (which opens locally next week) with four awards, including Best Picture, Best Actor (Heath Ledger), Best Director (Ang Lee) and Best Score. King Kong received five awards in technical categories, while Felicity Huffman (Transamerica), Reese Witherspoon (Walk the Line), Frances McDormand (North Country) and Matt Dillon (Crash) were all honored for their acting. The group also gave the William Holden Lifetime Achievement Award to comedy legend and Las Vegas resident Jerry Lewis. At this point, the Oscars are merely a formality.
DVDs |
King Kong: Peter Jackson's Production Diaries (NR) (3 stars)
$39.98
Talk about putting the cart before the horse—or, in this case, the organ grinder ahead of the monkey—Universal has already released a two-disc gift box of King Kong-related ephemera, all of which normally would have been reserved for a "collector's edition" DVD. "Production Diaries" comes with a 52-page production memoir and art prints documenting the six-month shoot. In addition to Jackson's commentary, there are contributions from nearly everyone connected to the film, from the actors to the animal trainers. The entry "The Making of a Shot: The T-Rex Fight," reveals the magic behind one of the movie's most exciting scenes without spoiling a thing.
My Classic Cars: Legendary Muscle Cars (NR) (3 stars)
Extreme Steam (NR) (4 stars)
$59.99
As Tim Allen so capably demonstrated in Home Improvement, male Homo sapiens are as likely to be turned on sexually by a well-tuned lawn-mower engine or shiny socket wrench as any Playboy bunny. That preternatural urge is what puts these wonderful packages from Questar into the no-brainer category when it comes to gifts for dads of all ages. Horsepower, and lots of it, is the fuel that powers the six-volume Legendary Muscle Cars, which originated on the Speed Channel series My Classic Car. The generous package of auto-erotica features the products of '50s- and '60s-era GM, Ford, and Chrysler (a.k.a., Mopar), as well as "Jay Leno: Certified Car Nut." For nostalgic train-spotters, Extreme Steam is also guaranteed to raise a smile. Among the titles are "Santa Fe 3751: Route of the Chiefs," "Steam '98," "Union Pacific's Clinchfield Challenge" and "Workin' on the Santa Fe."
Super-Duper Suitcase-O-Magic (NR) (3 stars)
$14.95
Starter kits for aspiring magicians are among the most evergreen of Christmas gifts. All come with a selection of rudimentary tricks and an instructional book that some kids will find fascinating, but will baffle those whose talents lie elsewhere. What separates Will and Mac King's "Magic in a Minute" from those gathering dust in countless attics is the addition of a DVD that demonstrates and "explains" gags laid out in Book-O-Magic, using props included in suitcase. DVD technology allows kids to use the freeze-frame, reverse, and slo-mo functions to put each of the 14 tricks under the kind of scrutiny VHS cassettes were ill-equipped to provide. And King makes learning fun.