Get Your Parents to Buy It for PC, Download the Patch, Watch Badly Animated Cartoon Sex and Go to Hell |
"We should all be deeply disturbed that a game which now permits the simulation of lewd sexual acts in an interactive format with highly realistic graphics has fallen into the hands of young people across the country."
Flashback to 1992:
"Dan Quayle is 'out of touch' with 'real problems and real people.'"
@#!$*! |
A list of films ordered by uses of "f--k," according to Wikipedia, an online encyclopedia in which (obviously) anyone can enter and edit articles.
1. Nil by Mouth (470)
2. Casino (422)
3. Martin Lawrence Live (347)
4. Summer of Sam (326)
5. Twin Town (320)
To paraphrase a local ultralounge's ad campaign, only 422 f--ks for Vegas' favorite film? We demand a recount!
Scotty Has Been Beamed Up |
"Just before they went into warp, I beamed the whole kit and kaboodle into their engine room ... where they'll be no tribble at all."
"Diplomats! The best diplomat I know is a fully loaded phaser bank."
"She canna take much more!"
James Doohan, 1920-2005, best known for his role as Montgomery "Scotty" Scott on Star Trek.
DVDs |
The Upside of Anger (R) (4 stars)
$27.95
After being stranded by her husband and father of their four daughters, Terry Wolfmeyer (Joan Allen) tries to suppress her anger under gallons of gin. Her kindred-spirit neighbor is a retired baseball star (Kevin Costner) who, when he isn't boozily hosting a radio talk show, finds solace in being able to hold the Wolfmeyers together. The interplay between the stars is wondrous, and the story never feels overly polished, clichéd or contrived. As lovers thrown together by circumstances beyond their control, Allen and Costner are far more convincing than were Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton in Something's Gotta Give.
3rd Rock from the Sun: Season 1 (NR) (3 stars)
$39.98
Few sitcoms have dared as much as Bonnie and Terry Turner's 3rd Rock From the Sun, in which four extraterrestrials materialized in a college town, disguised as an average-looking Ohio family. Their earthly aliases weekly clashed with their inner aliens, even as they were required to decipher the intricacies of the human condition. John Lithgow chewed the scenery as if it were made of cotton candy, and everyone else in the cast followed his manic lead. In addition to the first 20 episodes, the four-disc package includes lots of fan-friendly stuff.
The Jerk: 26th Anniversary Edition (R) (3 stars)
$19.98
Before Steve Martin found fame as an actor, playwright, essayist and art collector—in other words, became an insufferable snob—he almost single-handedly bridged the chasm between stand-up comedy and large-scale rock 'n' roll shows. The Jerk provided him with his first lead role as a Gump-ish hick who accidentally becomes a millionaire, as well as a co-writer credit. With 26 years worth of hindsight, the farce seems both juvenile and dismissive of anyone whose IQ wasn't in the same league as the star. But it provided all the proof needed as to Martin's screen presence and ability to sell tickets. Teenage boys likely will still get out a kick out of it.