Do you find Gran Turismo 4's realism too intimidating? Have you yet to see the finish line in an authentic driving simulator while there are still cars behind you? Then consider Forza Motorsport your driving instructor. It will tell you when to start a turn, when to reduce speed and when to accelerate. And if all else fails, it'll do the whole friggin' race for you.
Forza makes the GT4 formula accessible to anyone. While still offering hundreds of cars with precise specifications to die-hard gear-heads, it also offers tips on handling the various rides to the casual racer. And the Drivatar system actually lets you train the CPU to drive your way while you sit back and watch. Best of all, Forza offers realistic damage, for those of us who like to break pretty things in addition to collecting them.
SAMURAI WESTERN (M) (2 stars)
Atlus
PlayStation 2
Have you ever seen a really old western, where the gunslinger passes the same sagebrush four or five times because the small set is being recycled? Samurai Western is kind of like that. As you hack 'n' slash your way through similar dusty towns, you fight the same bad guys over and over, who keep saying the same things when they attack and the same things when they die. By the hundredth time you hear, "Die, you son of a ..." you start to consider hara-kiri.
FINNY THE FISH & THE SEVEN WATERS (E) (2.5 stars)
Natsume
PlayStation 2
This underwater adventure can't decide if it's for the big fish or the minnows. Its cutesy factor and simple fetch quests are perfect for the little ones, but the occasional jumping puzzles are tough enough to have seasoned gamers floating upside down. The open-ended aquatic world captures what it feels like to be a fish, and after you've struggled to get off a few fishing hooks, you'll never look at seafood the same again.
PREDATOR: CONCRETE JUNGLE (M) (1.5 stars)
Vivendi Universal
PlayStation 2, Xbox
Ever since Arnold and his band of G.I. Joes on steroids first encountered the Predator, the alien on safari has seen his franchise go steadily downhill. It's finally reached rock bottom with Concrete Jungle. The ridiculous story has the Predator playing cold-blooded skull collector one minute and ghetto hero the next, with stealth mechanics so frustrating you'll constantly be eyeing the self-destruct mechanism on your arm. This game is, as Arnold once said, "one ugly motherf--ker."
Matthew Scott Hunter has been known to mumble, "Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, start" in his sleep. E-mail him at
[email protected].