There are few things quite as satisfying as subtly orchestrating the perfect hit. You infiltrate the target area, quietly taking out all the necessary guards and disposing of their bodies in creative ways. And now you can even bribe police to lose evidence, allowing you to keep your precious low profile. Then, once you've carefully arranged for your mark to be taken out in what will appear to be an accident, you walk into a room, and for no reason at all, everyone suddenly knows who you are, what you're there to do, and how to remedy the problem with a steady hail of gunfire.
Maybe after three Hitman games, Agent 47 has a permanent look on his face that says, "I kill people for money," and it's a dead giveaway. Or maybe the enemy AI's just a little out of whack. But whatever the reason, there are few things quite as frustrating as a suddenly clairvoyant guard—and his telepathically-alerted buddies—forcing you to abandon your work of artistry for a spontaneous third-person run-and-gun-fest. This series still has some great ideas, but they're marred by clumsy execution—two words that are shameful for a hitman.
STEAMBOT CHRONICLES by ATLUS (3.5 stars)
Platforms: PlayStation 2.
Rated: M.
Apparently, in the future, the technology for the wheel has been lost, so people get around in hulking mechs as though they were cars. This quirky RPG quite accurately describes itself as "a relaxing nonlinear adventure." So don't be surprised if you're fighting Trotmobile battles one second and leisurely playing your harmonica the next.
MONSTER HUNTER FREEDOM by CAPCOM (2 stars)
Platforms: PlayStation Portable.
Rated: T.
It's truly amazing that Capcom was able to take the graphics of Monster Hunter, which already looked impressive on the PS2, and put them on the PSP without changing anything. But even more amazing is that they put the awkward combat and tedious dinosaur egg hunts in without changing any of those either. At the very least, they could've removed those dorky prehistoric cat people.
LEMMINGS by SONY COMPUTER ENTERTAINMENT (3.5 stars)
Platforms: PlayStation Portable.
Rated: E.
If everyone you knew was jumping off a cliff, would you too? Probably not. But lemmings succumb to peer pressure a lot more easily than you do, so it's your job to lead the way as a good role model through over 150 puzzling levels. If you've ever played Lemmings before, then the bulk of these levels will seem awfully familiar, but for the uninitiated, swiftly moving these green-haired critters out of harm's way is perfect for gaming on the go.
Matthew Scott Hunter has been known to mumble, "Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, start" in his sleep. E-mail him at
[email protected].