Nights on the Circuit: Social climbing

Wednesday, February 28, 9:55 p.m.

Oh, push it, push it real good." I sing along to the Salt 'N' Pepa leaking out from the Rockhouse as I wait in the interminable valet line. I just nearly mowed down a dozen fanny-packed tourists while turning into the Imperial Palace. You know, the ones who balk about the demise of the cheap buffet but charge blindly into oncoming traffic. Breathe, sing. I'm just about to bust out a modified Cabbage Patch and a seated version of the Running Man when the out-of-breath attendant swoops in to collect my car. There is a two-pronged pole assault occurring onstage when I stroll in. At the top, swinging around by the ceiling, is a tattooed, raven-haired, rockabilly beauty; below, a ginger-haired nymphet does her own thing before moving on to a chair that must have looked lonely. Both sport black fishnets and towering platform heels. To the tune of Rod Stewart's "Hot Legs," Kitty and Heather carry on like this while an audience of similarly dressed ladies whistles and cheers.

Hosted by the West Coast's governing hot body, Fawnia Mondey-Dietrich, and the East Coast's Mary Ellyn Weissman, the IPF has gathered dancers and studio owners under one roof for the first time ever to exchange ideas and techniques, and to demonstrate the diversity that exists under the vast pole-dancing umbrella. There is no competition tonight, just pure exhibition and raw exhibitionism. And I've arrived just in time for the Vegas girls!

While Fawnia—my pole-dance teacher from last summer—shimmies to the top of one of the Rockhouse's three poles and slides down with a rag of alcohol to clean away the oils from the previous act's hands, Amy Facklam readies backstage. She sprays Firm Grip anti-slip resin on her hands and feet, behind her knees and in the crooks of her arms. This will allow her to hold some of the more outrageous positions, ones where the dancer is at 90-degree angles to the pole or is suspending her body weight from one knee. Any way you look at it—live or in photos—it's art.

She whips her little body around the pole like a jump rope, and lets her long, sinewy legs hit the chains that adorn the bar's walls. To an Arabic house beat, she goes straight for the top of the pole and, like many of the girls, incorporates the ceiling into the act, using it to push off of as she spins and slooooowly slides down. A teacher at Fawnia's Pole Fitness Studio in Henderson, Amy is also training to be a yoga instructor and an aerialist and is a working dancer known at Spearmint Rhino for her ballerina act. Legs akimbo, hanging every which way, Amy goes a full minute without touching down onstage. Jaws, too, hang midair. Behind the curtain, Las Vegan Jenyne Wilson is next up, and Tiesto's "Walking on Clouds" sets the pace for a crisp, sexy performance. A performer in Le Reve, Jenyne is opening her own Studio Mariposa on March 12 behind the Fashion Show Mall. At this level of skill, the girls seem to live at the top of the pole, which has me wishing we could see them on a much taller piece of equipment. Using her knees and elbows as clamps, she leaves her arms and legs free to move. For the finale, she pins an ankle behind her neck and slides down like a feather fluttering to the ground, which is where I have to pick up my tongue as she takes a little bow and disappears.

It's over all too soon. "I'm really proud to have everyone under one roof," Fawnia says, bidding everyone good night, "so that we can meet and exchange ideas, become friends and become one with the pole." I'll say! The TV's screens now read "Rockhouse: Bringing down property values on the Las Vegas Strip since 2006," but I'd argue they just shot up a bit.

Xania Woodman thinks globally and parties locally. And frequently. E-mail her at [email protected] and visit thecircuitlv.com to sign up for Xania’s free weekly newsletter.