STATE OF THE CITY |
Hawking Vegas, Street by Street What's the price of a little PR these days? If there's one man who knows, it's our mayor, street hustler extraordinaire. Did we say "street" hustler? As in, one who sells the streets of Vegas to random readers of a New York-based magazine? Indeed we did! Mayor Goodman is pawning off a Vegas street in Jane magazine—"Register to shop on JANE Street, and you'll be entered to win a trip to Vegas, gifts from our sponsors and the chance to have a street in Vegas named after you, you you by the good mayor" says the website. (It also features a sizable photo of Oscar himself, sure to come as a weird shock to readers of the sassy young women's magazine.) Jane paid $2,000 to the city for the pleasure—money that will go to charity, officials say. Gratuitous, honorary street naming may not be so far outside-the-box; after all, this is a city with a street named after Jimmy Buffett. But what's next for Oscar B. Peddling? Hold onto your hats! |
Not Only Accurate, Fair, Balanced and Objective, but Insensitive and Sexually Inaccurate, Too!
KTNV-TV 13 sports-guy-turned-anchor Ron Futrell on the February 9 edition of the morning news:
"On a program note, I want to acknowledge that I made an inappropriate comment last Friday following a story about a father and daughter's incestuous relationship. I know many viewers were offended. My comment was out of line and I want to apologize to you."
Futrell had remarked on-air February 6 that the father and daughter, who were convicted in Alabama, should have moved to Massachusetts—equating incest with same-sex relationships. (The state's supreme court had recently affirmed that homosexual couples have the right to marry.)
Gray Matters heard from several of those offended viewers—as did Futrell.
News Director Craig Hume told the Weekly after Futrell's apology, "As a station, we are committed to being accurate, fair, balanced and objective in our reporting of the news."
Um, What's the Question Again?
"These hot Stallions aren't just dancers. They are entertainers who answer the question: If women ran the world, this is what The Strip would look like."
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From press release for Palomino Club's debut of all-nude male dancers this Saturday.
Glocks! We Got Your Keychain Glocks!
The large machine o' fun at Tacos Mexico at Tropicana and Valley View is decorated with stickers of teddy bears and bouncy bears and other warm snugglies. But inside the contraption is a different surprise! There are plastic receptacles, like the ones you get from bubble gum machines at grocery stores, filled with guns! knives! mini handcuffs and other weapons, all conveniently melded on a chain to help you carry your keys. Observed a skinhead-looking fellow who denies any affiliation with the Arayan Nation: "That gun looks like a Nazi luger!" Bring your own quarters, kids, because the counter people frown on making change. Though they're great at making churros ... and hawking lugers!
Update: Dude, I'm So (Legally) Waffled, Part 2
Healthy, crunchy, green victory rained down on the hemp industry last week when the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 9th Circuit told the Drug Enforcement Agency that it can't regulate naturally occurring THC in hemp foods. The lawsuit, which has been going on for two and a half years, attempted to ban granola, waffles, veggie burgers and other edibles made from hemp seed. Last year, Weekly staffer Kate Silver consumed mass quantities of hemp food over a 12-hour period and then took a drug test to see if she tested positive for anyting bad. Of course, she didn't. Thanks to the courts, we can now eat our hemp in peace. (Sprinkle a little poppy seed on it and put on some Pink Floyd if you're feeling extra randy).
The French Care About Us Again. Don't Let Them Down!
There's a new French magazine that's calling for that certain je nais se quois that makes Las Vegas so Las Vegas. It's a travel magazine of a different ilk—one that could stand a new translation program. According to its promo material, "L'etranger is therefore a magazine that speeks of a world in which different men live, come across one another and meet. It is gaged at all those that have curiosity in their viens and those who cannot conceive of life without leaving and brushing up against the unknown."
The summer 2004 issue will feature a short story, plus polaroids and pamphlets about living in Las Vegas. But they need someone to write that 25-page story. The winner receives 1,220 something—euros? dollars? meat goats? Try it out anyway. Or, as they say in poorly translated French: Show your trump! For more information see www.letranger.info.
Shirley, You Jest!
All of a sudden, Clark County School Board Trustee Shirley Barber wants board members to take a refresher course on open meetings law and no, you cynics, it's not because university regents don't know an open meeting from a closed one.
"This is a serious responsibility we all face and the law can be difficult to understand."
Bolivian Jockeys Infiltrate the Sex Industry!
From a February 8 Contra Costa Times article on the re-sexification of Vegas: "You lookin' to get wild, buddy? You know, Vegas-style wild, with gals who are, let us say, hospitable? Then what you need to do is find the little guys, from Bolivia mostly, standing on the sidewalk no-man's land between Paris and Bally's. And, in case you don't notice them, they make hissing sounds, like broken squeak toys to pique your prurient interest. "These jockey-sized hucksters are slick—most people don't even notice them slipping one of the little cards into their hands."