Hi, I'm Mayor Oscar Goodman. You might remember me from such promotional extravaganzas as "Gin Is In but the Homeless Are Out" and "Hey, Kids, Drinking Is Fun!" We could do this all day. After all, "Goodman promotes self" is the "dog bites man" of local journalism: so obvious and everyday it's barely worth mentioning. Except in the Review-Journal, which last week hit readers with this late-breaking fluff: Oscar Goodman T-shirts would be handed out during the weekend's Centennial festivities! (Old journalism maxim: If one person talks about it, it's nothing; two people, it's a trend; if three people are likely to see it on eBay, that's a story.) The shirts depict Goodman as Vegas Vic, saying, "Yee-Haw!" and were expected to be an XXL hit. "I guarantee it's going to be pandemonium," said Jim Ferrence, the man responsible for the shirts.
Monday's paper carried no reports of T-shirt-related rioting over the weekend, but there was "mild chaos" as disorderly revelers grabbed handfuls of the giant birthday cake highlighting Sunday's Centennial. Also, someone brought an iguana to the Helldorado parade. Let the lizard eat cake: It's the rallying cry of our weird new century.
Elsewhere on the Goodman-ubiquity front, the R-J did its part to keep the mayor's runaway pride in check by including two other people in the photo of the mayor it ran on the cover of Friday's Neon section.
"Senators waver" is the "Goodman promotes self" of legislative politics; alert the media when they don't waver on something more pressing than the official state china pattern. This time, the subject is a bill that would allow Nevadans to order prescriptions from Canada. Some fear the practice is illegal, not trusting the loopholes exploited by other states that have made the Canadian connection. Pass this bill, they seemed to be saying, and we guarantee there will be pandemonium. That seems to be particularly true up north, where Canadians still haven't accepted their duty as American citizens. As one Canadian health-care official told lawmakers, "Canada cannot simply be America's drugstore." Why not? It's always worked for Mexico.
In other Carson City news, Democratic assemblypeople are bogarting the voter-pleasing tax-rebate issue—they've countered Gov. Kenny Guinn's plan (everyone grab a handful of money like it was promotional cake) with a plan of their own (everyone grab a handful of money and don't pay taxes on it). Guinn's spokesman told the R-J that if the new proposal gives residents their money while avoiding tax problems, the guv "could have a positive discussion on it." With that collaborative approach to problem-solving—since your plan is better than mine, I may be willing to talk!—the rest of the session should be a piece of cake. Yee-haw!
"Michael Mack supports candidate" is the "iceberg dead ahead!" of city politics, so it's interesting to see Mary Gillins rearranging the deck chairs on her Ward 6 campaign by citing the often-mocked, ethics-conflicted incumbent as a role model. (The iguana wasn't available?) "He's going to be instrumental," she said last week, barely suppressing a yee-haw. "He knows everything." Put that on a T-shirt under his picture and we'd pay a buck for it on eBay.
Let's Do the Math! |
+1 Studies show Lake Mead is healthy enough to dump wastewater into, which is good—we've been doing it for years.
+3 Percentage of high-school seniors passing proficiency tests rises. Perhaps it's something in the water.
+2 One-month statewide casino win tops $1 billion for first time (in March). And this was before factoring in drink prices at Wynn.
-3 It costs more to stay in the hospital in Las Vegas than it does in San Francisco—a town that probably doesn't even dump wastewater into its drinking source.
Final score
+3
What Do You Mean "We"? |
"What we don't want is for the effluent to be put in the lake and sucked down through Hoover Dam before it has a chance to dilute."
Thursdays with Oscar |
We attend the mayor's weekly press conference so you don't have to
May 12
Main Themes: Optimism raised (1), deferred (2) and misplaced (3); things smothered in layers of hardening crust (4).
Summary: The gathering was preceeded by word of a big announcement (1), but as the mayor went through his usual description of his activities since the last press conference (4), reporters noticed that nothing in his schedule (speaking to paralegal convention, giving a key to the city to Hard Rock impresario Jeff Beacher, playing in a charity poker tourney) had the sound of a big announcement being made (2). In a comment that probably won't be included in the Wynn Las Vegas press kit, he mentioned visiting the resort and said the floor mosaics reminded him of Pompeii—the Italian city famously covered in lava (4). He mentioned traveling to Carson City to talk up lawmakers about the need for an academic medical center Downtown (1)(4). Pressed, he said he hoped the state would pick up the project's entire $250 million tab (3). Asked about the major announcement, the mayor said the announcement of the announcement was "premature." (2) He couldn't talk about it at the moment.
Odd note: Probably figuring that no announcement that didn't leak beforehand was worth driving to City Hall for, most press skipped the press conference.
Scott Dickensheets is a Weekly writer at large. Give him crap (or cake) at
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