Local
Legislators cram 120 days worth of wasted time into one week of work
As every 120-day legislative session has gone since time began, elected officials gather in Carson City and get wined and dined by special interests and otherwise sluff around for 115 days and then someone looks at a calendar and realizes it’s time to decide the really important stuff and go home. It’s just like in college, when you’d goof off all semester and cram for 72 hours straight for the final exam. So, with Professor Jim Gibbons presiding over the class, there was a flurry of activity on Thursday, as key bills covering education and road construction and other stuff were hashed out, with just enough direction to keep our taxes shifting around until 2009, when the next cram session takes place. We at LasVegasWeekly.com are still waiting for our invite to the post-“graduation” toga party at Gibby’s.
National
Bush and Putin ready to party like two wild and crazy guys!
Over in the Big Bad Apple, “The New York Times” is reporting that a “top Russia expert at the State Department has issued an unusually sharp criticism of Moscow’s behavior under President Vladimir V. Putin, describing the Kremlin as bullying its neighbors while silencing political opponents and suppressing individual rights at home.” With our own Prez, Bush the Two, due to host Mr. Putin at the Bush family compound in Maine, we at LasVegasWeekly.com put up our hands and drafted the following formal invitation on behalf of “W”: “Dear Vladimir the Terrible. My wife and I cordially invite you and a guest to visit our really big American house in Maine on July 1. Please bring your filthy interpretations of democracy and human rights, as well as attire suitable for sailing: which for a Russkie probably includes black socks and sandals. (Haha.) We do not allow visitors to bring pets onto our property and ask that you refrain from eating ours. (Hahaha!) There will be much vodka and Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. You will be having seltzer water and Ritz crackers. (Oh, hahahaha, I’m totally on a roll!) I’ll welcome you out front by the mailbox at 8.30 a.m. Please approach slowly with hands raised or I’ll give the order to nuke you square in your Russian nuts. Cordially, George the Jokester.” In keeping with our policy of advancing world democracy, we are not charging the White House for this custom invitation.
International
Les nationalistes corses appellent a la reouverture du dialogue
Les principales organisations nationalistes corses appellent Nicolas Sarkozy et son gouvernement à relancer le dialogue en vue d’une “solution politique négociée” à la question insulaire. “L’installation d’un nouveau pouvoir en France au lendemain de l’élection présidentielle est pour nous l’occasion de lancer un appel solennel: il faut que l’Etat change de politique en Corse. Il doit s’engager dans la voie d’une solution politique négociée,” précise leur appel.
Your Weekend Weather
Our award-winning meteorologist, Boy on the Roof, is predicting torrential downpours and extremely high humidity over the weekend. When he returns from his jaunt to Bangkok he’ll let you know what to expect on the weather front in Las Vegas.