Local
Las Vegans not pumped about gas prices
The average price of gasoline has reached $3.20 a gallon in Las Vegas, according to a story in today’s Review-Journal, a record high. To put that into perspective: That’s twice as much as when gas was $1.60 a gallon, whenever that was. Businesses that depend on vehicle use are being forced to increase delivery costs and find other ways to counter the price at the pumps. Our solution at LasVegasWeekly.com: Serious carpooling. We are riding with anywhere from eight to 10 employees per car on our way to the office, and to avoid looking conspicuous when we arrive and pile out, we’re all dressing as clowns. The boss thinks it’s an improvement.
National
Hookset, New Hampshire: It’s the new L.A.!
“The Boston Globe” has set us all straight on one thing: Tinseltown does not have a monopoly on hot gossip. Apparently, in Hooksett, N.H., two married town employees were up to some hanky panky (they still call it that in New Hampshire), and now that the cat’s out of the bag (they still say that too), the rumor mill is veritably on fire. Reports the Globe: “Town Administrator David Jodoin was deeply troubled by the rumors about his personal life. He complained to the Hooksett Town Council, which launched an investigation of the gossip at the town offices. When the brief probe was over, the town moved quickly to action, and fired four town employees for spreading the rumor. If town officials hoped to quell the chatter, their action has had the opposite result. The town hall drama has become the hottest topic at Robie’s Country Store, the unofficial epicenter of buzz about local affairs; the rumor has been aired in the pages of local newspapers. And the firings of the four women -- long time employees who had earned stellar performance reviews -- have unleashed a wave of disbelief and anger among many residents.” Do not be alarmed! LasVegasWeekly.com has dispatched its crack team of gossip spinmeisters to the Northeast and should have this situation under control before the rest of the country feels its aftershock. (Footnote: Robie’s Country Store has asked us to announce that they have an end-of-season sale on men’s fleece underwear.)
Sports
Is hockey getting soft?
With all the rule changes and whatnot, hockey is no longer the glorious blood sport it once was. But just how far is this digraceful emasculation going to go? Our very close friends at ESPN.com are reporting that the Ottawa Senators (we’re pretty sure they’re from Canada or somewhere) are offering free tickets to a Buffalo Sabres fan “after learning the Buffalo woman was repeatedly punched in the face following the Sabres’ 3-2 win in Game 4 of the Eastern Conference finals Wednesday.” Now don’t get us wrong. We’re not saying that the woman in question should not be compensated for the cowardly act she was victim to. What we ARE saying is that she should get the tickets PLUS a half hour on the happy end of a bullwhip with the thugs who beat her. Now THAT’S old-time hockey!
WoeBiz
Baby, you just can’t make this stuff up
David Hasselhoff. Name ring a bell. “Baywatch.” Been in a little Vegas show. Had a little video doing the rounds recently. After the recent ballyhoo about Dave’s drinking problem, LasVegasWeekly.com was stunned to learned that in a contest between two parents – the other being the mother of his two kids – Hass finished … FIRST! Despite his recent caught-on-tape bout with the bottle, a judge has granted him custody of the kids. Apparently the judge, who must’ve had enough on Hass to have him sterilized, was shocked by the evidence presented against his former spouse. Is this an awesome country or what? All we can say is: PLEASE, your honor, just give us a peek at that evidence! (You know we ain’t gonna tell anybody.)