Con-ven-ience
“Convenience - /Con-ven-ience/ n. Something that increases comfort or saves work. Personal comfort or advantage.”
Meaning “online convenience” is often an oxymoron.
I have to admit I can really go either way on this topic. Las Vegas is pretty much known for being technologically advanced and efficient, and without my online resources and Microsoft Office I’d be rendered virtually useless in this market.
However, I also have an opinion on why it sucks.
“Poof”.
That is the materialized sound of everything important electronically crashing into a million pieces and disintegrating into nothingness. “Poof” may sound to the untrained ear as harmless as a small child’s snowball, but to the accustomed party it’s a 21 gun salute in a metal factory.
Not only have I lost enough documents and research to put up a memorial wall, I’ve occasionally come to loathe this little piece of technology. How about the instances where it plays on your impatience? The times where the computer won’t actually register what you’re doing -- it just stores it quietly, maniacally… and eventually decides to execute it all at once. Because that’s “convenient.”
“File. Hello? File. Open file. Okay, stop. STOP. Show desktop. Come on, just show the desktop. Fine, well, just bring my screen back. Maximize. MAXIMIZE, WILL YOU -- crap.”
Next thing you know there’s thirty files flashing up and down, your mouse has ceased and you’ve won three vacations in the Bahamas. Halfway through closing all the offensive pop-up windows, for no good reason at all, my document hops right up in front and takes the bullet for my “free vacation” mid-repression of the “close” button. There it goes. Ciao! It’s been great. That’s my computer. And I’m rather abused by it, because I’d be even more pathetic without it.
In conclusion: “convenient” is Tupperware. “Convenient” is sticky notes. “Convenient” is NOT when you train a pet bear from infancy and then it eats you. Yeah, think of it like that. Convenient is not an electrical quirk that, ironically, contains everything important to you.
Precocious entrepreneur, workaholic and a rabid perfectionist Crystal Starlight knows a thing or two about getting ahead at a young age. Email her at [email protected]