“I’m a comedian who sounds like Artie Lange. I didn’t always; there was a time when I sounded like every other sweet Indian boy. Then I discovered comedy. And by ‘discovered comedy,’ what I really mean is ‘discovered booze and cigarettes.’ Now my voice has the tone of Sam Elliot’s colon. I had gotten comparisons to Mr. Lange throughout my career, but it really hit home at July’s Montreal Comedy Festival, when everyone heard me talk and turned around to see if Howard Stern’s sidekick had made a rare festival appearance ... only to be disappointed that it was a Nobody (me). They put me behind an Artie Lange look-alike, and we did a weird impromptu ventriloquist act. I don’t mind being compared to Artie Lange. He’s amazing, so I’m honored by the vocal comparison. When people start comparing me to him in the looks and weight department, then I’ll worry.”
Artie Lange. November 15, Augustus Ballroom, 11:59 p.m.