1. Los Campesinos!, “You! Me! Dancing!” Ramshackle, wall-of-sound indie-pop from Cardiff, Wales, with funny words about not being able to dance and a Joy Division-obsessed drummer who dares you to do your best anyway. (Rating: 4.5 out of 5.0) (myspace.com/loscampesinos)
2. 50 Cent featuring Justin Timberlake, “Ayo Technology.” Cartoonish and creepy virtual porn saga (“I’m tired of using technology,” Timberlake groans—oh, really?) with a Pac Man-inspired bed track that’s the most avant-garde-sounding thing on urban radio right now, and better than anything else either of these giants has coughed up lately. (4.0) (myspace.com/50cent))
3. Miley Cyrus, “See You Again.” Disney popper Cyrus—aka Hannah Montana, and the daughter of Billy Ray—takes the rhythm and cadence from Corey Hart’s throbbing ’80s hit “Sunglasses at Night” and transforms it into a clench-fisted rocker. And then adds a lovely splash of spaghetti-Western guitars. More effortless by half than Avril’s “Girlfriend” or Kelly Clarkson’s “Never Again,” this may well be the sleeper teen-pop hit of 2007. (4.0) (myspace.com/mileycyrus)
4. Montana Da Mac, “Rock On.” Name-dropping Ozzy, hanging backstage with the drummer from Blink-182 (talk about street cred ...) and “born to be wild,” this is the sequel you never requested to “Party Like a Rock Star” (which, by the way, I underrated last month). Slow, grindy, zoned-out acid-hop that’s only irritating until you enjoy it for the stoopid-fun ear candy it is. The guitar squall is hilarious—so dirty-sounding and so utterly plastic, which is somehow befitting of this burgeoning mini-genre. (3.5) (myspace.com/montanadamac)
5. Lethal Bizzle, “Bizzle Bizzle.” Dentist-drill UK grime from an MC who disses the lameness of other MCs’ MySpace profiles and who spits out word-bullets faster than you can translate them. In just two minutes and 30 seconds, Lethal and his munchkin minions repeat the phrase “Bizzle! Bizzle!” 72—count ’em, 72—times, just in case you forget who you’re listening to. (From the CD Back to Bizznizz.) (3.5) (myspace.com/lethalbizzlemusic)
6. Natalie Imbruglia, “Glorious.” Ten years after the dazzling “Torn” (aka the “lying naked on the floor” song), Natalie returns with a stadium-sized Dixie Chicks tribute. Her ambition rather dwarfs her vocal ability here, but for shimmering, mainstream Aussie pop that’s a little bit country, a little bit rock ’n’ roll, this isn’t bad. (3.0) (myspace.com/natalieimbruglia)
7. Brad Paisley, “Online.” Catchy if generic country hit with a silly-funny premise. In real life, the pizza-shilling protagonist lives with his folks, is “5’ 3” and overweight” and has “never made it to second base.” Online, he’s a different breed of species altogether: 6’ 5”, drives a Maserati, has women clawing their way toward him. Brad even brags about his MySpace profile—imagine! (2.5) (myspace.com/bradpaisley)
8. Cassie, “Is It You.” Nowhere near as mysterious or spine-chilling as last year’s “Me & U,” this mostly just highlights how anonymous a singer Cassie is: The sparseness of her voice just sits there in the mix, flat as beige wallpaper. Disappointing, though it’s neat how she veers subtly into White Stripes territory with those clipped, distorted guitars. (2.5) (myspace.com/cassiemyspacemusic)
9. James Blunt, “1973.” The voice behind “Beautiful” doesn’t want to be Mr. Soft Rock, he wants to be Mr. Quiet Storm. It’s adult soul he’s peddling here, not Barry Manilow, and though he has neither the smarts or the (duh) vocal chops of Al Green, circa 1973 or any other year, he is neither entirely inept or the devil in disguise. At least I don’t think he is. (2.0) (myspace.com/jamesblunt)
10. Sean Kingston, “Beautiful Girls.” I passed on this pop-dancehall smash last month because of that cloying “Stand By Me” sample. Now, since it’s shot to the top of the charts on the strength of a hook about killing yourself (which you may want to do after the 67th or so listen), and primed to give “Umbrella” a run for its money as the most overplayed single of the year, I feel honor-bound to weigh in with a comment. Annoyingly effective? Effectively annoying? There’s undeniable pop genius at work here, sure, but trust me, it ain’t within spitting (or raining) distance of the Rihanna track. (2.0) (myspace.com/seankingston)