I’m just okay, OKAY?

The service industry workers of Nevada are not comfortable with my current emotional state.

“How are you?” they ask.

“I’m okay,” I respond.

And then they say, “Just okay?”

They say “just” the way Steve Martin says “Excuse me.”

Then they tag on something else like, “That’s too bad! You should be feeling great!”

Next time somebody tries to cheer me up by telling me that I’m wrong to feel what I feel, I’m going to respond thusly:

“I do feel great, sometimes. And when I do feel great, I really feel great. I feel a deep greatness — one that’s never felt by the people who ostensibly always feel great. I’ll tell you this much: if you walk around feeling ‘great’ all the time, you don’t know what ‘great’ feels like, and I pity you. Now can I please just put my sandwich order in?”