Time-stopping orgasms? Four comic books to watch for this spring

J. Caleb Mozzocco
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      Big Hard Sex Criminals

      By Matt Fraction & Chip Zdarsky, Image Comics, March.

      This double-entendre collection of one of the most unusual books on the stands is indeed big and hard: Its pages are bigger than those of the monthly issues, it collects all 10 to date for a page count topping 250 and, of course, it’s hardcover. The story? Just your typical heist comic. In which the two protagonists have the power to stop time. But only when they orgasm.

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      Archie vs. Predator #1

      By Alex de Campi, Fernando Ruiz & Rich Koslowski, Dark Horse Comics, April.

      In the tradition of 1994’s The Punisher Meets Archie comes an even more unlikely crossover, in which the badass space monster best known for hunting future governors and Aliens-with-a-capital-A comes to Riverdale to hunt the least dangerous game: Archie, Jughead, Betty and Veronica. It’s a four-issue miniseries, so the matchup can’t possibly be as one-sided as it sounds.

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      Groo Vs. Conan

      By Mark Evanier, Sergio Aragonés & Thomas Yeates, Dark Horse Comics, April.

      This is a crossover so obvious that it’s almost shocking it didn’t happen earlier. Aragonés’ Conan-parody character Groo, created in 1982 and going from publisher to publisher over the years, finally crosses swords with Conan himself, now that both are with the same publisher. While it flatters Groo fans more than Conan fans, its sheer weirdness makes it broadly appealing.

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      SuperMutant Magic Academy

      By Jillian Tamaki, Drawn & Quarterly, May.

      Tamaki’s This One Summer recently became the first graphic novel to receive a Caldecott. This one’s a bit … different. Set in a prep school that’s half Hogwarts and half Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters, Academy balances sarcastic afterschool-special setups with superhero genre jokes, all involving characters whose weird appearances and powers mask just how hilariously teenaged they are.

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