Taste this and see if it’s bad

I'm not ashamed to admit that I really like the movie Forget Paris. You remember—the one where Billy Crystal plays a love-stricken basketball referee. (50 percent on RottenTomatoes.)

Anyway, there’s this scene in which Crystal gives his soulmate some rules for living. One of them is, “Don’t ever hand me fruit and say, ‘Taste this. See if it’s bad.’”

Well, my real-life girlfriend just wrote me a real-life note that puts that line to shame. Found it in the fridge, stuck to a plate of what used to be a blueberry sausage breakfast patty. Read it and weep:

“You can have this ... I don’t like it. Not sure if it's cooked all the way.”

Tempting offer, but I’ll pass.