A & E

All the Arts + Entertainment You Can Eat



TV



Father of the Pride (1.5 stars)


NBC, Tuesdays, 9 p.m.


First of all, why are they lions? Aren't Siegfried and Roy known for their white tigers? Shouldn't those be the main characters? Second of all, who came up with this? It's perhaps the most bizarre idea for a TV show ever: It's like a lame sitcom, but then with slightly more racy jokes, but then all the characters are animals, and it reportedly costs $2 million an episode to produce. Why did that seem like a good idea? The good news: The animation really does look nice, and it's not a total train wreck like some predicted. The bad news: It's not a total train wreck, so you can't laugh at how bad it is, and you certainly can't laugh at the actual jokes.




Josh Bell



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Judging Books by Their Covers



Unfit for Command: Swift Boat Veterans Speak Out Against John Kerry

By John E. O'Neill and Jerome R. Corsi


$27.95


Nothing shouts "read this book" like a scary man asking—make that demanding—that we pull his finger. Where did the publishers find this photo, at a casting call for The Mummy Returns? (Suddenly, mandatory Botox doesn't seem so unconstitutional.) Maybe we'll wait until Slow Boat Veterans speak out against Kerry.



Bushworld: Enter at Your Own Risk

By Maureen Dowd


$25.95


While sales lines like "Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist for the New York Times," always make us elbow others out of the way to grab a book, what really appeals to us here is the cartoon. Look at that cute little president! A 10-gallon hat on a half-pint fella! It makes you want to give him some warm milk and listen to his schoolyard tales of stirring up Islamic hatred abroad and curtailing civil rights at home before tucking him in for the night.



American Soldier

By Gen. Tommy Franks


$27.95


You can tell from the cool beret, blurry flag and the image of Franks relating to troops that no boat-borne veterans will be dissing this guy. And if they did, the stern, craggy look on his stern, craggy features tells me he'd respond with something a little stronger than "Pull my finger"!




Scott Dickensheets



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DVDs



Shaolin Soccer (PG) (3 stars)


19.99


Shaolin Soccer is to Bend It Like Beckham as Major League is to Field of Dreams and The Longest Yard was to Rudy— same ball, much different ballpark. After being sliced and diced by Miramax, the Hong Kong hit was a haphazard amalgam of special effects, eye-popping kung fu acrobatics, slapsticky athletics and offbeat romance ... though the English dubbing might have been the most hilarious element.



Tom Dowd & the Language of Music (NR) (4 stars)


$24.99


Legendary record producer Tom Dowd probably was the only man who could brag of being there at the birth of both the atomic bomb and rock 'n' roll. After contributing to the Manhattan Project, he perfected technology making it possible to tape musicians on single tracks. Among the artists with whom he worked were Aretha Franklin, Ray Charles, Eric Clapton, Otis Redding, John Coltrane, the Allman Brothers Band, Tito Puente, Dizzy Gillespie, Thelonious Monk, Cream, Lynyrd Skynyrd and Booker T. & the MG's. This highly entertaining documentary includes many insightful interviews and some wonderful archival video footage from memorable recording sessions.



Darby O'Gill and the Little People (G) (3 stars)


$19.95


Here's a Disney classic boomers will want to share with their digital-age grandchildren. Sean Connery, at 29 several years before 007, is the caretaker of an estate populated with mischievous leprechauns. Connery's singing is less than memorable, but seeing the banshee and death coach is still chilling.




Gary Dretzka





Local CD



Conflict of Interest (2 stars)


My Own Conflict


Crappy nu-metal retreads reign supreme in the local rock scene, and Conflict of Interest is among the most egregious of the bunch. Well-produced but trite and unoriginal, their self-released debut is a tired mix of Godsmack and the Disturbed, with generic riffs, a little screaming, a little rapping, and nothing worth a second listen.




Josh Bell


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