THE DREAM ZONE
with Lauri Quinn Loewenberg
I find change everywhere on the floor—not a little bit but a lot. In my dreams it's how I make money to live. Why am I always picking up change and not bills?
I'm in a gay relationship—I'm 27 and he's 19. We've had extremely different upbringings that make us have difficulty in communication. He lost his father when he was 4 years old. When he was 10, he was molested by his uncle; by 13 he'd been kicked out of his mother's house for being gay, by 15 he was battered and raped by two anonymous men, and at 16 was molested again by the man who took him in when his mother kicked him out at 13. He's just two years out of high school and surrounded by people who support him because he's cute, but I don't feel they have his well-being at heart.
I was raised in a very loving household with both my parents, who supported me no matter what. Of course, I had traumatic issues growing up as everyone does, but I certainly didn't have to deal with what he has at such a young age. I'm pursuing a career in music through the record company I founded, and I own a real-estate investment corporation that's doing well. I've been educated at a major university, traveled around the world to gain experience on world perspectives and speak three languages. I'm proud of who I am and my accomplishments and my confidence shows. I believe this intimidates and frustrates him.
I'm a very caring person who operates intuitively. He's also very loving, but his approach to life is much more practical than mine. I know he loves me very much and wants to help me in my business life, but in most issues, he lacks the formal education to understand, much less help. I feel as if he thinks he doesn't have a significant enough role in my life because of our different experiences. He's told me he feels irrelevant because he can't buy me the things I want. The only thing I want is for us to love each other and pursue our dreams together. At the end of the night, we can hold each other to re-energize each other's spirits so we're ready to take on the next day. My boyfriend has never experienced being truly loved—only the act of loving. He's told me that although he hopes things will work out, he believes they won't.
I believe that through hard work and love anything is possible. Our communication styles are so different, but his inability to trust me is going to destroy our relationship. Do you believe there's any hope? I do love him.
I did two separate dealings of the cards with your question. The first set talks about the soul-connection of the relationship. The second set spoke to the potential of the relationship.
You're right: If he doesn't begin to trust that you intend to be a constant in his life, this relationship will not survive. I know this because there was one card that repeated in both queries that represent your young man. In traditional tarot, the five of pentacles is a card that represents spiritual, emotional, and financial loss. It's depicted as two beggars walking through the snow outside, illuminated by the glow of a church's stained-glass window. The church is open to them, yet they ignore that option and continue begging through life, barely surviving. In the OSHO-Zen Tarot it is depicted as a young boy looking over a glowing pasture through a gate. The boy doesn't realize that the gate is unlocked.
In both cases, it represents a person yearning for a blessed life, yet convinced that he doesn't deserve one. He must resolve the past in order to become (in his mind) an equal in the relationship. Lastly, there's a great deal of potential here but to him, it's as though he's found a huge, beautiful diamond on a desert island while he believes there's little chance of rescue. He's wired for survival, not love.
Mona Van Joseph is a licensed professional in the psychic arts through the city of Las Vegas. Her show, Midnights with Mona, airs weeknights on KDWN 720 AM. You may e-mail questions to [email protected]