ARIES
(March 21-April 20)
Just when things seem like they're getting better, because the Moon's in Aries Sunday and Monday, Mercury has to go and enter Libra, your opposite sign, on Tuesday. If you're thinking of splashing the town with large red graffiti declaring, "You can all drop dead!" I'd can it. I know you hate that wishy-washy feeling of thinking like a Libra, because you guys like to get right to the point. But please spare us the Big Horn, and back the hell off. Next week, when the Moon's in Leo, things will swing your way again. Love: be prepared; Career: take notes; Health: OK.
TAURUS
(April 21-May 21)
Yet another week with a major planet squaring you. Will you ever catch a break? This time it's Mercury in Libra (a mental juggling act). A zealously practical soul, you loathe dithering. Yet you could get into hair-splitting conversations and find yourself wanting to gore a bore. Remind yourself that this too shall pass. Unfortunately, you won't see a compatible Mercury until it's in Capricorn on January 4th. Oh, come on. You guys like yourselves too much to let a little strange thinking get you down. Love: renew vows; Career: 2006 brings luck; Health: ask, receive.
GEMINI
(May 22-June 21)
You just got lucky, as Moon in Aquarius trines Jupiter and Mercury in Libra trines Mars. It's really great for work/career. Try not to gloat, but it's OK to flash a smile and wave now and then to those less fortunate. Moon square Pluto should keep you humble; it's a little basso, so your feet shouldn't leave the ground completely. You could trade power trips with an office ninny. But the Jupiter/Mars thing should carry the day. Make the most of it all week, as Moons in Aries and Taurus are on your side. Love: melt; Career: keep believing; Health: enjoy.
CANCER
(June 22-July 22)
The full Moon in Pisces on Saturday should create an alluring weekend for all water signs. Venus in Scorpio offers a sexy detour from the mundane aspects of life. Venus is the planet of love, and Scorpio is about sex and death. Put those two together and you have a night on the prowl, whips, chains, black satin sheets and chocolate sauce dribbled over naked skin. Or just call up your sweetie and have a flirty conversation. Whatever floats your boat. Love: tease it; Career: try wearing stilettos to the office for once; Health: swingin'.
LEO
(July 23-Aug. 23)
Are you a little annoyed by all the sultry goings-on that make friends oblivious to your current problems? With Venus in Scorpio, especially since it's opposing you, you can't seem to hail a taxi these days, never mind getting someone to take your end-of-summer slump seriously. When the Sun leaves Leo for Virgo, it's always a bit of a letdown for you cats, but you should revive Sunday-Tuesday, when you trine the Moon in fire-sign Aries. (You might want indulge in some Scorpionic amusement yourself). Love: pounce; Career: it gels; Health: blend.
VIRGO
(Aug. 24-Sept. 22)
Wednesday, when the Taurus Moon conjuncts Mars, you'll feel right at home. The full Moon in Pisces, your opposite sign, could cause a bit of angst for you on Saturday, especially if a certain someone is not returning your calls or is out of town. With Venus in Scorpio, it's good to have a favorite boy-or-girl toy on hand. Things will perk up midweek, however. You might want to plan a picnic, so you can roll around in the clover. Love: countdown to a liaison; Career: don't hesitate to ask—they'll want to know you're assertive; Health: share a spa date.
LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 23)
You'll have fun the next couple of days, as the Moon in Aquarius trines Jupiter in your sign. This should bring the week to a magnanimous close, as deals solidify and—adding steam to the air—love slides home Friday night, as Moon trines Venus. And what a Venus it is! It's in rocket-fueled Scorpio, sign of all that's sexy. To air signs, that means fantasies abound. You could call up a Gemini and plan to meet somewhere fabulously nasty. Oh, just shut up and do it. Love: yummy; Career: a watched pot never boils; Health: clear your mind.
SCORPIO
(Oct. 24-Nov. 22)
Deep into Venus in your sign, you must be either a.) a hysterical, horny mess or b.) swaddled in whipped cream. After a rather arid entry of Saturn into Leo, this torrid interlude could be overwhelming, but I'm betting on "b."
Also, the full Moon in Pisces on Saturday night should have you guys jumping around like Tom Cruise on Oprah. I think I've mentioned that strange spectacle in my column before, but the image keeps replaying in my own turgid mind. Sorry. Anyway, it fits. Love: eek; Career: make the most of your sex appeal; Health: don't isolate.
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 23-Dec. 20)
You can be uncomfortable with Venus in Scorpio, because it's about sex that gets you into trouble, sex that binds, sex that grinds. It doesn't pretend to be other than hungry and passionate. Sag is about "higher" love, though many Sags have Venus in Scorpio. It's contrary to their nature, but I've seen many of these tragic souls spend years and too much money lookin' for the man (or woman) that got away. If that's you, be warned: The wolf is upon you till October 9, when Venus enters your sign. Quel relief! Love: watching; Career: do your best; Health: travel light.
CAPRICORN
(Dec. 21-Jan. 20)
All this talk about lascivious, Venutian-Scorpionic commingling has you yawning away. Your own sexual urges are stable, prosaic, humming along. As if! Get a clue, Cap: Venus in Scorpio effects everybody, even a stoic like yourself. Hasn't your neighbor's nocturnal bedspring song awakened you more than once recently? Is there nothing more erotic than the sound of love? Let's face it, Venus in the sign of sexuality is a welcome relief at the end of a long, dry summer. Wednesday, when Moon conjuncts Mars in Taurus, you'll be all business. For a minute. Love: in the way?; Career: breakthrough is imminent; Health: harmonize.
AQUARIUS
(Jan. 21-Feb. 18)
Hooray for today! Moon in Aquarius trines Jupiter and Mercury trines Mars, offering up luck, smart thinking and action, so you'll be there when the promotions are handed out. Mercury is in Virgo, and Moon squares Mars (sorry, I didn't mean to sneak that in on you) so things might seem tediously mundane for a few days, as a square can slow things down and irritate. However, Mercury enters Libra Tuesday, giving your brain some breathing room in an otherwise cluttered world. Love: don't fight it; Career: it will happen on or after Wednesday; Health: share knowledge.
PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20)
You've been in something of a tail-(or fin)-spin since Venus entered Scorpio last Saturday. Has it been fun? I can only imagine the exciting caves and reefs you've been exploring, experiencing highs and lows of pleasure during this period of astrologically-sensuous bliss. The weekend, with a full Moon in Pisces, should play out like Zumanity for you, unless you decide you're way too old for such shenanigans, and stay in with some DVDs instead. Sorry to burst your bubble, but guess what? You're never too old! Love: an adventure; Career: easy; Health: don't underdo.
Martha Woodworth is a Las Vegas psychic and astrologer. For inquiries about private readings, e-mail her at [email protected] or call 866-6682.