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Las Vegas Weekly Staff

Las Vegas Weekly Staff

Story Archive

  • Music

    Wednesday, May 12, 2010

    See if you can tell the genuine Chesney wordsmithing from the very clever fakes.

  • Art

    Wednesday, May 5, 2010

    The sketchbooks of artist KD Matheson show the workings of the mind behind some of the most otherworldly images in town.

  • As We See It

    Wednesday, May 5, 2010

    From Pet Smart to Wolf Parade, some thoughts from the Weekly staff.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, April 29, 2010

    Senator John Ensign says most Las Vegans would “take offense” at being compared with Wall Street.
    Just like most senators would take offense at being compared with John Ensign.
    Steve Wynn considering moving his headquarters to Macau.
    He still believes in Las Vegas, but since China’s going to rule the world soon, he figures now’s as good a time as any to get in their good graces.
    Las Vegas and Clark County may share fire services to save money.
    It’s very simple: If you live in Las Vegas and have an emergency, call the county ... er, the city ... er ...

  • Nightlife

    Wednesday, April 28, 2010

    A slew of Cinco de Mayo fiestas where things are bound to get loco.

  • A&E

    Wednesday, April 28, 2010

    "My desk is both a prison and an escape,” says Alissa Nutting, a Schaeffer Fellow at UNLV and author of the forthcoming story collection Unclean Jobs for Women and Girls.

  • Print

    Wednesday, April 28, 2010

    From Poker Woman: How to Win at Love, Life, and Business Using the Principles of Poker, by Ellen Leikind

  • As We See It

    Wednesday, April 28, 2010

    “If Nevada fits in in some way, we need to step up and do our part."

  • Features

    Thursday, April 22, 2010

    Because who doesn’t love a whole slew of lists?

  • As We See It

    Thursday, April 22, 2010

    Woman tries to make a citizen’s arrest of Karl Rove for “war crimes” during Las Vegas book signing.
    We’ve skimmed his pro-Bush Administration book—and we’d like to suggest changing the charge to “literary crimes.”
    Jesse James’ ex-mistress Michelle “Bombshell” McGee to appear at Las Vegas strip club.
    That’s always been our main beef with our strip clubs—not skanky enough.
    Kenny Chesney premieres Summer in 3-D concert film in Las Vegas.
    Avatar revived a really tired concept, and here’s hoping that Kenny Chesney’s junk in 3-D will kill it.

  • As We See It

    Wednesday, April 21, 2010

    Uncorrected excerpt from a Las Vegas Craigslist posting for a 1970 Camero—asking price: $9,000.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, April 15, 2010

    Criminal investigation launched after Las Vegas firefighter comments on Facebook that she wants to shoot County Commissioner Steve Sisolak in the groin.
    She also drew suspicion for achieving a ridiculously high score on Lexulous.
    Paris Hilton reportedly splits from Doug Reinhardt.
    We’re not usually big fans of the “It’s not you, it’s me” breakup line, but in this case—yeah, that actually works.
    Gubernatorial candidate Michael Montandon says he supports Yucca Mountain nuclear-waste dump.
    He’s obviously been reading How To Lose An Election In One Easy Step.

  • Music

    Thursday, April 15, 2010

    Click your way to nonsensical band name gold.

  • Music

    Thursday, April 15, 2010

    For four local bands, this time it's all about their stuff

  • Noise

    Thursday, April 15, 2010

    ...because there's more to the year than Coachella.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, April 8, 2010

    David Hasselhoff in talks for his own Las Vegas revue.
    We’re not sure what we’re looking forward to more—his next showstopping number, or his next drunken attack on a hamburger.
    U-Haul: Las Vegas ranks second among popular moving destinations in the country.
    To all those people, we say welcome, but with a caveat: David Hasselhoff hasn’t agreed to a show just yet.
    Report: Las Vegas Valley grew too quickly.
    Brought to you by the Institute for Stuff That Was Pretty Obvious About Four Years Ago.

  • Wednesday, April 7, 2010

    See the country music star for free at The Joint.

  • As We See It

    Wednesday, April 7, 2010

    "I'm not opposed to sex."

  • Friday, April 2, 2010

    Get your tickets to see the super group live at The Joint.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, April 1, 2010

    Tea Party of Nevada candidate Jon Scott Ashjian compares himself to Rosa Parks.
    First a male prostitute did so, now a third-party candidate. If Rosa Parks were alive today, it’s likely she’d say, “For THIS I refused to give up my seat?”
    “Markus,” Nevada’s first male prostitute, quits over lack of customers; brothel owner replaces him with prostitute dubbed “Y. Not.”
    Women who can get sex from just about any man at any time are more likely to refer to him as “Y. Bother.”
    Lights on Las Vegas Strip go dark for Earth Hour.
    It was easier to accomplish than you think—a lot of the lights were already off.

  • Politics

    Wednesday, March 31, 2010

    Rating some actual Tea Party propaganda

  • As We See It

    Thursday, March 25, 2010

    “Normally you don’t discharge into a flood control channel. You discharge into a natural river or a lake.”

  • Dining

    Thursday, March 25, 2010

    Eat your way around the globe without leaving town.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, March 25, 2010

    Entry fees to increase for Red Rock Canyon, including a first-time fee for bicyclists and pedestrians.
    It all began with officials wondering, “How can we get even fewer people to visit?”
    Vince Neil launches three-jet fleet in Las Vegas, promises customers a rock-and-roll-themed journey.
    He wanted a Jimi Hendrix-themed journey, but given the strict nature of flying nowadays, he had to settle for the Jonas Brothers.
    Tiger Woods’ ex-mistress Rachel Uchitel threatens Jeff Beacher with lawsuit over “hooker” and “slut” comments on Facebook.
    Beacher’s expected to lose so many Facebook friends, he’ll have to SuperPoke himself.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, March 18, 2010

    Mayor Goodman drops controversial proposal to mass-fire, rehire city workers.
    Says ruefully, “It’s just not convoluted and baffling enough”; vows to come back with “something really messed up.”
    Amy Winehouse reportedly plans to marry ex-husband Blake Fielder-Civil in Las Vegas.
    The ceremony will conclude with the traditional tossing of cocaine.
    Federal appeals court upholds Nevada law barring legal brothels from advertising in Clark County.
    In related news, political ads go unchecked.

  • A&E

    Wednesday, March 17, 2010

    “What did I learn from this experience? Are you kidding me? Who said anything about learning anything? I didn’t learn a damn thing.”

  • Thursday, March 11, 2010

    See the multiple personality comedian live at Caesars Palace!

  • Help Desk

    Thursday, March 11, 2010

    Katie Price’s Las Vegas wedding to Alex Price a sham because minister was unregistered.
    Not a real minister? That’s okay. They’re not real celebrities.
    Unemployment in Las Vegas rises to 13.8 percent in January.
    John Ensign is hard at work on a solution—cutting unemployment benefits entirely. That’ll motivate your lazy asses!
    Fortune ranks Boyd Gaming No. 1 least-admired company in the world for product and service quality.
    At first this shocked us—until we realized the company has New Jersey properties. Makes sense now.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, March 11, 2010

    “We’re pretty thrifty—not in terms of being economical but in terms of being miserly.”

  • As We See It

    Thursday, March 4, 2010

    Lindsay Lohan cancels nightclub hosting gig without explanation.
    Explanation? It’s Lindsay Lohan. Make up your own, and you’ll probably be right!
    Guards at Wayne Newton’s house turn away deputies trying to serve $500,000 court judgment.
    So Newton’s got money woes, but he can still afford kick-ass guards.
    Tickets for next round of Garth Brooks shows at Encore Las Vegas sell out within hours.
    Resort currently hard at work on a system that will make it impossible for Brooks to ever leave the property again.

  • Features

    Thursday, March 4, 2010

    There are lots of things that deserve an award upside the head.

  • Music

    Tuesday, March 2, 2010

    Testing your knowledge of the King of the Surf Guitar, Dick Dale

  • Friday, Feb. 26, 2010

    Win tickets to see The Flood at House of Blues.

  • Friday, Feb. 26, 2010

    Here the sounds of Jimi Hendrix as respected rock and blues artists pay tribute at The Joint.

  • Help Desk

    Thursday, Feb. 25, 2010

    Obama announces on recent visit, “I love Las Vegas. Always have.”
    Las Vegas says it forgives Obama this time, but that he’d better start telling the city it’s pretty every once in a while.
    Harrah’s acquires Planet Hollywood.
    Against Barack Obama’s strict orders, mind you.
    Nevada Gaming Control Board report says Las Vegas casinos lost $6.5 billion in 2009.
    Harrah’s asks, “Uh, did that check for Planet Hollywood clear yet?”

  • As We See It

    Tuesday, Feb. 23, 2010

    “When they hang the (presidential) seal on the podium, does it mean he’s in the building?”

  • Help Desk

    Thursday, Feb. 18, 2010

    Heidi Montag debuts new face, body in Las Vegas.
    Unfortunately, the personality transplant is still on back order.
    Man sets hugging record in Las Vegas, with 7,777 in 24 hours.
    Surprisingly, he also set the world’s record for knees in the groin in a 24-hour period.
    Gambling revenues rise 5.9 percent in December.
    Finally, a bright spot to the economy—people gambling away their family’s futures again.

  • As We See It

    Wednesday, Feb. 17, 2010

    Which of these phrases was uttered in the last week to describe the impact of Gov. Gibbons’ proposed budget cuts?

  • Help Desk

    Thursday, Feb. 11, 2010

    Obama tells nation not to “blow a bunch of cash in Las Vegas when you’re trying to save for college.”
    Yeah, do it the proper way: Wait until you’re in college, then blow it all in Vegas during spring break.
    Las Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman calls Obama a “slow learner” for making second Las Vegas comment.
    Speaking of which: Hey Oscar, you do realize we’re never getting a professional sports team, right?
    Wayne Newton allegedly abandons rotting, moldy jet in Detroit for the last three years.
    They would have discovered this sooner, except he left it in, you know, Detroit.

  • Film

    Wednesday, Feb. 10, 2010

    From Wolfgang Puck to 'Beowulf' and everywhere in between.

  • Wednesday, Feb. 10, 2010

    Get nostalgic with free tickets to see Sinbad live in Las Vegas.

  • A&E

    Wednesday, Feb. 10, 2010

    “She didn’t look familiar, but she did look drunk.”

  • As We See It

    Tuesday, Feb. 9, 2010

    We’re the 11th drunkest city in the nation, and police are worried about a few people, most of whom would be staying on the Strip and not driving anywhere, getting high?

  • Jim Gibbons

    Tuesday, Feb. 9, 2010

    Gibbons says he hasn’t had sex since the ’90s; a few tips for getting back in the game...

  • As We See It

    Wednesday, Feb. 3, 2010

    In closed meeting, Dina Titus says Democrats are “fucked” unless they learn a lesson from the Senate upset in Massachusetts.
    She also told the meeting that coffee was for closers only.
    His fight with Manny Pacquiao canceled, Floyd Mayweather agrees to fight “Sugar” Shane Mosley.
    Far be it from us to say that boxing’s reputation is in trouble, but rumor has it Dina Titus had a choice word to describe it in a closed meeting.
    Report: Las Vegas led the nation in foreclosures in 2009.
    But don’t worry, Las Vegas—all your politicians, lobbyists and bank managers still have their homes. Feel better now?

  • As We See It

    Tuesday, Feb. 2, 2010

    Considering the state of the state, Gibbons is probably really nervous about giving the state-of-the-state address.

  • As We See It

    Tuesday, Feb. 2, 2010

    “I don’t recall him being involved in any of that.”

  • As We See It

    Tuesday, Feb. 2, 2010

    Hey, Obama, stop trying to please everyone.

  • Thursday, Jan. 28, 2010

    Enter to win free tickets to the Joint's resident show.

  • As We See It

    Thursday, Jan. 28, 2010

    Rapper Flavor Flav involved in car accident in Las Vegas.
    There was some grill damage, and the front of Flav’s car got a little dinged up as well.
    Investor Carl Icahn acquires $2 billion Fontainebleau project for $157 million.
    Icahn also set to change his title from “investor” to “shameless opportunist.”
    Las Vegas unemployment rate increases to 13.1 percent.
    This Help Desk item was outsourced to India. We humbly apologize for the lack of humor and hope you have a pleasant day.